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I Tried the Most Glittery Kids' Lip Glosses Adults Will Wanna Wear Too

Almost 40 and covered in Unicorn Snot.

Sarah Burns · 8 months ago

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I’m not sure what age I was supposed to stop wearing glitter, but I’m pretty sure it’s the same age I was supposed to start liking seltzer. After a lifetime of loving glitter, the beauty industry traditionally insists we call it quits and leave it to the younger generations. I’m privileged to be part of a Girl Boss generation that challenges ageism and gender roles, and is deeply rooted in the notion that a person can be both  feminine and powerful. Busting through a glass ceiling is twice as dazzling when you're doing it covered in glitter.

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Yes, glitter can be hard to get rid of. And, yes, lip gloss can be icky-sticky. But if you’ve never carefully applied a glittery lip gloss, I highly recommend giving it a try. For many, this simple act of self-care is an instant glow-up, an empowering boost you can turn to any time of the day to instantly feel closer to being your best self.

I easily have dozens of them — lost in purses, forgotten in coat pockets, and sitting in every catch-all container I have sprinkled randomly about my home, which is also covered in glitter for various reasons. Here, I’ve ranked my favorites on a 5-star scale based on Sparkle, Shine, how Sticky it is, and whether or not it Stays.

Daze Of The Week Variety Pack

Sparkle: ⭐⭐

Shine:    ⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:   ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Stays:    ⭐

With this set, you can keep track of the days of the week, M-UGH-day through Friyay! A dab'll do ya; the flavors and texture are super syrupy and start off sticky, but it all wears off fairly quickly. Their light, shimmery colors are sheer and tinted, and despite their colorful appearance in the tube, they all look pretty much the same when on — but hey, you can use them to keep track of the days!

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Accurate representation of this lip gloss.

This set is packed nicely in a clear zippered pouch for safe keeping, but party planners could easily break up the set and pop a tube a piece into gift bags for parties. Or if you’re an elder-millennial with a weakness for adorable packaging and cute days-of-the-week color names, you can tell yourself, “Great, one to keep, and some to give away!” before inevitably trying them all, because how do they get them to layer like that though?

Unicorn Snot Lip Gloss

Sparkle: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Shine:    ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:   ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Stays:    ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Available in five, holographically glittering shades, Unicorn Snot goes on smooth straight from its plastic tube applicator, and its sweet smell is reminiscent of sugary cupcakes. The gloss itself is only slightly tinted and doesn’t add much color on its own, so it serves mostly as a vehicle for heaping amounts of glitter. All shades contain holographic glitters, as well as glitter in a matching color as the tint. 

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As is the case with most lip glosses, Unicorn Snot goes on super sticky, and on a windy day, attempts to apply it WILL leave you with slicked strands of glittery flyaways stuck to your face and lips. Fortunately, the stick doesn’t stick, and after a few minutes the gloss softens the lips and the glitter stays put around your pout. 

I can’t stress enough that the glitter factor here is not playing around, and you could easily end up looking like you just chugged glitter straight out of the shaker in the craft aisle at Michael’s (please don’t do that). No judgement here, but for everyone else, you might want to start sparingly on the snot and build up.

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Also, be sure to watch where you stand, or you’ll risk blinding loved ones with the refracted rays of light emanating from your dazzling pout.

Nailmatic Rollette Lip Gloss

Sparkle:  ⭐⭐

Shine:     ⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:    ⭐

Stays:     ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Look at this intriguing color! Don’t worry, these glosses are clear, except for a bit of sheer glitter. If you’re looking to experiment with something more modest, or if you want the best gloss for a sparkle-loving kid in your life that also won’t get sparkles everywhere, this might be your perfect pick. 

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No Smurf-lips here; this gloss is clear!

Its apricot-kernel oil and vitamin E formula ranks it as the best gloss on this list in terms of actual lip care. The coconut scent is a little strong at first, but the flavor is light and doesn’t make me feel like I’ve just turned my lips into a tropical drink. The glass tube and rollerball tip makes it really easy to apply, unlike plastic gloss tubes where an over-squeeze means you’re stuck with a thick, sticky pout or a lot of wasted product. Almost no stick at all with Nailmatic just nourishing oils, and a touch of sparkle.

Fashion Angels Glitterlip Lip Gloss

Sparkle:  ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Shine:     ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:    ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Stays:     ⭐⭐

Shimmery magic in a tube! The clear gloss goes on a little slick and sticky, and it takes a little while to sink into skin. It feels very similar to Unicorn Snot, but with some key differences: The glitter is solid, vivid colors, with no holographic bits, so it doesn’t quite catch the light in the same way. I have Pixie Party, which is filled with brilliant yellow-gold glitter, and Mermazing, a shimmering purple. Without good lighting, the purple glitter in Mermazing can end up looking like weird dark specks all over your mouth, and once the stick is gone, the glitter doesn’t last too long.

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The vanilla scent is very nice, but I found the flavor a little strong. I’m not sure my pre-teen self would agree with that assessment, since licking it off to reapply is sometimes half the fun, but either way, this is a solid pick for a touch of glitter and a bit of mineral oil for soft lip care even if you do have to reapply it a few times. 

Did I mention they’re also super inexpensive? Get them in a few colors, and play around with mixing and matching! Pixie Party is easily one of my all-time favs — the yellow gold shimmer looks awesome on it’s own, but amazing with a coral color layered underneath!

Glossy Pops

Sparkle: ⭐

Shine:    ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:   ⭐⭐⭐

Stays:    ⭐⭐⭐⭐

If a lip gloss sorcerer cast an enchantment on the cool kids table, they would all be turned into Glossy Pops. These subtly sweet treats look like the fanciest lollipops you’ve ever seen, decked out in rhinestones and an adorable charm on the end, hinting at their flavors.

Screen Shot 2021-03-04 at 5.49.11 PM

As you might guess, Glossy Pops are sweet, but not overly so, and the rounded balm is buttery smooth, and hydrating. This is the only lip gloss on this list that contains not a single speck of glitter, but that doesn’t mean it’s completely lacking sparkle — twist off the bejewelled stick to reveal a wand applicator for a high-shine gloss to layer over the balm, locking in moisture. 

The packaging is inventive and extremely cute, but a little impractical. I’ve had luck tucking them into a weird little pocket in my purse that’s probably meant for pens, and it’s too big to lose completely inside a big bag, but this isn’t made for popping in a pocket for easy use. Nonetheless, if you need to chase away the winter blues and help your dry lips look fabulous without using a lip color that might dry them out even more, Glossy Pops has you and your lips covered.

Fashion Angels Light Up Lip Gloss

Sparkle:  ⭐

Shine:     ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:    ⭐⭐⭐

Stays:     ⭐⭐

This lip gloss is totally lit! There’s a switch on the snazzily-patterned cap with several light up modes, great for spontaneous raves and slumber parties, or for pretending your glowing gloss is some sort of magical lip potion.

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Lights aside, you can never go wrong with a basic wand gloss. There’s a little sparkle that’s more noticeable in the tube than on your lips, but the formula isn’t overly sticky, and it goes on satisfyingly slick. It smells nice, tastes sweet, but not too strong — I have the Lemonade, and it tastes kind of like a Lemonhead that’s been left to dissolve in water — but if you like a little shine in your look without the drama of tons of sparkle, this one will really lighten up your day.

Petite’n Pretty 10K Shine Lip Gloss

Sparkle:  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Shine:      ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:     ⭐

Stays:   ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Petite ’n Pretty caters to the tween market and is the most “grown up” brand on this list. The result is a high-quality product that’s also cruelty-free and dermatologist approved. If you love playing with makeup but have sensitive skin or easily irritated eyes, you should absolutely look into this brand!

So it’s not surprising their 10K Shine Lip Gloss is also top-notch. The non-stick formula goes on a little tacky, but while most glosses can feel like a layer of vaseline, 10K absorbs quickly, leaving lips soft and hydrated. If your lips could use some TLC along with a touch of fabulousness, the soothing oils and all-natural ingredients make 10K a fantastic option. 

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The glass-like shine unfortunately wears off within minutes — or it does for my paper-like lips. If you’re going for the “my lips are actually under glass” look, you might want to skip this one, but if you’re in it for the sparkle, 10K delivers, packed with fine shimmering mica glitter with impressive staying power throughout the day. The shimmery bits are the same color as the gloss, which is sheer — and layered over dark colors, the shimmer really pops. It’s also lightly flavored (cotton candy!) and smells of their signature scent Cloud Mine: sweet, but not overpowering, like if someone turned fruit juice into a fancy perfume.

Taste Beauty Stranger Things 6 Piece Lip Gloss

Sparkle:  ⭐⭐

Shine:     ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sticky:    ⭐⭐⭐

Stays:     ⭐

Roll for initiative, and banish dry lips to a faraway demiplane! I confess, I bought these solely for fan-girl purposes, but their candy flavors and fruity smell did not disappoint, bringing back strong Lip Smacker-memories of my youth. It’s an adorable set for any fan, and for a novelty lip gloss, the moisturizing power isn’t that bad, assuming you can stop licking your lips long enough to let the oils do their thing.

The sheer colors are sparkly and vibrant in the bottle, but go one mostly clear; the resulting look is a really nice, subtle, sheer sheen with a touch of sparkle. They aren’t very long-lasting, and for the overall size of the bottles, you don’t get very much product, but you get what you pay for, and you could do way worse than this inexpensive, functional, fan-service set.

sweatybilly

Bonus fact for Strangers who love lip gloss: You know how Billy was like, SUPER sweaty through season three? Like, just-been-hit-with-a-squirtgun levels of moisture? No they didn’t keep Dacre Mongomery in the sauna between takes — it was a healthy dose of strategically placed lip gloss.